transparency

i have been asked to reveal my financial status. here it is. the red are my expenses (yes, i save every stupid little reciept and enter the prices in a binder) and the green is the amount of financial support i recieved each month, converted into euros according to the average exchange rate for that month.

street fight

wow. i just witnessed and interfered in a dramatic fight between a couple in their twenties. the guy was screaming at the girl all the way down the street.. about five minutes and loud enough to be heard over the radio and through the walls. when they were in front of our house, i saw out of the window how he threw her against the fence and strangled her. i ran out an dup between them and asked if there was a problem. he turned on me, an inch from my face and screamed more, now directed at me. the general stuff angry people yell at strangers i guess, about how i have no right to interfere and that i should go away, and if not he will make me. i turned to the girl instead and offered that she could come inside with me and drink a cup of tea if she'd like. she wanted to come, and was trying to get past the guy and he pushed her around some more. i got between them, and she was getting towards the house, but he kept grabbing her dog. she wouldnt go without the dog. stupid dog! i wish i could say i convinced him to let the dog go, or her to give him the dog, but i cant. he picked it up and ran off, and she followed him. they were still fighting. a few minutes laer they rode by in the streetcar, and he was giving her a kiss. i pray she gets the strength to leave him. i wish she would come back here tonight. i doubt she will. i am still a bit shaky.. lilly was scared for me, and the neihbors called the cops (from safely behind their doors).

there'a no place like...

HOME!
and thats where i am now. i just got back to bremen a few hours ago, and am glad to be here. i will start back-posting about the events between freakstock and now, but it might take me a few days to catch up on everything. alot has been happening!

welcome to my newest and dearest blog reader, pictured below.

~... ~

hamburg

in chemnitz i recieved two phone calls that decided my next stop. the first was regina, asking me to her birthday party the next saturday in hamburg. the second was lokke, who then said if i am in hamburg he would cook dinner for me. since hamburg is close to bremen, and i lived there for a long time, i was happy for a good reason to visit. i stayed with stefan and alex and their baby, and met with alot of my old friends. especially cool was meeting with eddie, the drug counselor of the jesus freaks and the person i learnt most of what i know from. we planned that he will come to bremen this fall and lead a workshop for the hope house, freaks, and cafe chance. disappointing on the trip was to see how much the freaks hamburg are suffering. there were only 30 people in the service (this group was at its largest 500, in the years i was there between 250 and 120 members) and rather discouraged. pray for them! they also cant keep their building because there isnt enough money comming in now. as of oktober they dont have a church to meet in.

chemnitz

after convoy i stopped by chemnitz to visit an old friend of mine, ilt. he is one of the leaders for jesus freaks saxony and has been going through a burnout. we had a great time of prayer and fellowship (climaxed in a one hour hike that lasted five and a half..). he is doing better now, but yall could still pray for him.

i know alot of people in chemnitz, so it is always a special time when i get to go there. the jesus freaks work closely with the salvation army, so there is always someone around the church. this was the first part of my trip that felt a bit like vacation. i was constantly invited to birthday parties, dinner, and bible studies. the four days were wonderful.

bus to cottbus

the last city on the convoy was cottbus. the first night we spent a few kilometers outside the city limits in the woods... in the morning we saw what kind of place we'd happend upon.. there were used condomes everywhere. i was soo glad i had been able to sleep in one of the busses! we didnt want to stay there even long enough for session, and most of us didnt want to go the loo there either, so we drove into town. there we found these two abandoned buildings, and had some fun figuring out how to get in and check them out. the cute one turned out to be in pretty bad shape, but the other was good. it apeared as if people are there pretty often.. and do curious things with pigeons..

the others went into town from there, to see where we could do street theater or have a concert, but i had the strong feeling to stay there and do some praise and worship. so i talked a few people into staying, and we sat down and sang. after a few songs a homeless man, andy, came over from the other side of the river. he thought it was really cool to see such a group of young people together the way we were... he was caught up in the atmosphere and love.. he stayed for lunch, although he kept trying to pay for it. i talked to him along time about God, forgiveness, and the Bible. he had never heard it before! this is the first time in europe i have been able to share such basic things. finally he excused himself, said, that i had opened his mind to so much, that he just needed to go think alone for awhile. we made plans to meet the next day.

in the afternoon we split up into smaller groups. i went with a few other girls into town, and landed at the same fountain where on convoy 2000 i had been part of the "slave-driver" street theater piece! i opened up the Bible, planted my finger, and began to preach. it was embarassing!!! but good.. at least it gave us new courage.

we werent able to hold a concert that night, so we did a juggling and light show. most of the group got into conversations during that with youth or nazis.... i ended up talking to three grandparents from bremen.. not quite the focus of our trip, but very funny. and the best is, they wouldnt let me go! they kept saying things like, "yes, but before you go.. explain grace to us."








the next morning a few of us went back to the river to meet with andy. it ended disappointing, though. he came very late and had a friend with him. the friend knew all about the Bible and wasnt interested, and kept blocking my conversation with andy. later i went with hobert through town and did praise and worship and loud Bible readings.

saturday was then the end of convoy. we ate around a small fountain and attracted a few youth who stayed with us durring session. one girl who dabbles in the occult began to cry and ran home. when she came back she was wearing the only non-black dress she has: her grammas wedding dress. she said she wanted to break with her past, and asked if they would take her somewhere else.. anyplace with a church.there was only one thing i missed out on: on their way back home, the berliners stopped by a lake and baptised my friend patrick.

hoffy birthday

the next place we went was hof. we'd been there before, but had only eaten something and then driven on. the french couple had the impression, however, that we werent finished there, so we went back to see what God had in store for us. the twins decided to show us an underground art gallery, so we went in (the door was open, but it was already late). it was obviously between installations, and there was a band practicing in one of the rooms. they found it amuzing that thirty people showed up at a gallery with no open exhibits, and laughingly asked, "hey, you guys got a drummer, a mic, and amt?' and we were like, "oh sure.. no prob, we'll go get them." at first they thought we were joking.. but we did have all of it. so we stayed and helped them in the forming of their new band.

eventually they found out why we were in hof, and decided that we could sleep in the gallery if we wanted. when they found out the next day was my bday, they even took off and organized drinks and a cake! (the supermarktets in germany close at 8, so they had to do a little work to get stuff!) so i celebrated with these total strangers.


the first conversation i had started with the sentence, "my exgirlfriend is a christian, and i really did everything i could to become one too... i even went to Alpha course and church.. but i just cant believe it all." yup.. that was fun. we talked to him about faith being a gift, and that he shouldnt pressure himself so much, but rather just be open for God to work on his heart, and we offered to pray with him. there were alot of cool conversations in hof.. once again we had been taken in by alternative people our age who didnt have anything to do with God.

the next day i went into town with patrick to try to distract myself from the fact that tommy (a very close friend) had left convoy. he bought me a super nice mousse filled chocolate bar for my birthday, but then disappeared.. i was looking around for him and spotted a homeless guy who looked sympathetic, so i went over in typical cate-style, and asked if i could sit with him and wait. i shared my chocolate with him, which got a cool conversation started. turns out he is also a christian. he had been living on the streets for nine years, since his wife left him, but doesnt take drugs. he was excited that we had come to hof to talk to people about God.

that night obadja played another concert there in the art gallery. one of the guys from plauen heard about it, and rode his bike two hours through the mountains to be there with us! the theater piece that went with the concert is pretty crass. children and mom might not want to look at the pictures:

in the dark auditorium, lit only by flashlights, two demonlike dancers crept up on the lead singer and ripped a pigs heart out of a bag over his chest, bit, tore, and stuck at it with knives. he began to scream that he is lonely, that no one can help him, and so on.. then he yells "JESUS" and another stands up, pushes back the demons, and takes a second pigs heart and places it in his bag. at that point he starts a praise song.

wet worship

monday we were blessed by being in a town with a thermal bath... and since we all needed to shower, we decide to go in the morning for the two hour ticket. (i was invited as a bday present!) now,, germans know how to do swimming pools. this was a series of pools, each with a different advantage.. inside the normal cold one (who goes in there??) and the jacuzzi. then theres a salt water pool that you can swim from inside to outside in, with a water massage shelf. then a lazyriver that takes you between the smell-dome, the feeling-house, and the light and sound house. (anybody jealous?) the best was the light and sound tower. the tower went up about three stories and was painted completely black, with a few laser lights flashing around the walls... and an increadible echo! we ended up in there for most of the time, singing slower worship songs. at one point i went out to find someone, and realized that our song was being echoed out into the whole area! so we unintentionally involved all the guests ina spontaneous worship service!

hippie party

on saturday we planned to move on, as hard as it was to leave our new friends in plauen. but then they invited us to join them on the countryside at a party... some friends of theirs had moved into a farm and started an alternative commune. so we went where no missionary could normally go. we got there in the late afternoon, and just spent the night hanging out with them, talking and dancing. and although they were of the opinion that christians are all stupid, we were able to have alot of meaningful and interesting conversations about our faith. on the next morning a few of them came to our session and listened... or let us pray for them.

stefen

i gotta tell about one person... as we were sitting in the bar, i saw a guy come in, and i yelled "hey! stefen?!" he looked at me, confused, and then sat down.. it turned out, his name is helmut. well, it shows you can be wrong.

the next morning i again greeted him, and in my havent-had-coffee-yet way, again called him stefen. in the course of the conversation i kept making statements about him, that turned out to be true. (ex: well, at 34 you must have at least thought about..." and he "i never said my age..") that evening he pulled me aside in the bar. it turns out, everything i thought i knew was right- including his name! helmut is a nickname they had given him a few years back... his real name is stefen.

i told him about stefen in the bible, and how he stood up for his faith, although it cost him his life. and i said i see that potential in him. we talked for three hours and he let me pray for him.

friday i ran into him in the city, in the middle of no mans land. after a few jokes, he told me that he and his friend had been walking around for four hours talking about what we'd been telling them. he said it's the first time in his life where he has realized that this is a topic that cannot be ignored, before he never even considered God. keep in mind, this is the former east germany. and the same night at our concert, he took that stand for us, putting his own reputation on the line he stood up for us when the others began laughing at us and our message, and he told them to be respectful or leave. and this in an anarchy bar!

pray for stefen. he hasnt yet (as far as i know) given his life to christ (none of those we met with did), but i believe he will.

plauen

contrary to the first convoy i went on (2000), this one was based on relationships and spending time with the locals rather than crazy street theater. thats surprising, because it was set up to be like the freakass in berlin (two years ago) where we went wilder than wild in the nations capital, shocking people for the Lord. (anyone who missed that, i'd be happy to tell some stories)but this convoy we barely got out on the streets.. God kept sending us to specific people, and even to their homes.

upon arrival in plauen, the group was still pretty shy and kept either to themselves in the back of the bar, or met on the street to cook and eat. i really wanted to get in with the people, so i grabbed thommy (the carpenter in the picture) and we joined them. we didnt try to stear the conversation, but just let it take its course, and soon enough landed in a conversation where they were talking about how much they disliked christians and the church. hmm. so i spoke up, and said that christians can't be judged by the church, and God cannot be judged by christians. (and so on, i had alot to say) the girl listened thoughtfully and said ok, she'd accept that (i basically was agreeing with her, but taking the blame away from God) and that maybe it was too general to apply her nagative thoughts to all christians. we still hadn't said that we are christians.. unless my "sin kills" sweatshirt gave it away. but this opened the door to some more personal discussions on faith. at the end they envited us to go with them to the next place.

that night some of us were offered beds in the house, others slept in their campers or in the squatted building. the next morning we had "session" on the roof... (see pic) prayer with a vieew. we just hung around and talked to the others the rest of the week.